Only So Far
by SomewhereElse31
Summary: Memories only go so far before they don't include true feelings. One-Shot.


**Present**

Why did she have Goosebumps?

Maybe it was the ice cold room, or the way he held her hand for the first and last time, but she felt them pierce her whole body, from her covered arms to her bare legs…

She stared into space, not wanting to see anything about him; his hair, his eyes…_his eyes_. Her eyes fell on the hardwood floor, covered in shades of silver, gold, blue and purple glitter. She glanced at her bare feet, sprinkled with the magic dust, and her black sandals only a few inches away…

He pulled her hand into his other, so he had a grip on all he could have on her. The warmth suddenly overtook her body and she wasn't cold anymore. She shuttered, covering her face with her free palm, but instantly mixing it with her salty tears…

She closed her eyes and allowed the extra water flow from them, and desperately tried to hear anything coming from outside; something she could use…

Nothing but the soft coo of an owl entered her ears…

She swore she could hear laughter, happiness, comfort…but it soon faded and all she could recognize was a faint ringing.

Something inside of her head told her to quit crying, or else she wouldn't be able to leave...

She wanted to…she needed to…

But then he got in the way.

* * *

><p><strong>13 minutes and 48 seconds before<strong>

"Oh hey Zach," she smiled brightly as she opened her wooden front door.

His eyes changed as he saw her in shorts and a long sleeved shirt with her hair down and bare feet. He knew she was casual, but he hadn't seen this side of her before.

"Hey, mind if I come in?" he breathed, almost forgetting what he came for when he saw her in person. Memories only went so far.

She jumped the slightest bit at his request. "Uh…sure! I'm just packing up some stuff." She shut the door behind him after he slowly made his way into the house he had never been into.

"More like everything," he said as he scanned the whole room, genuinely surprised to see the place almost empty.

"You going somewhere?" he turned back to her, still by the door, twiddling her thumbs. She seemed nervous.

She had wanted to tell him, but whenever she would see him she would forget all about it and never worry.

"New York."

No sound came out of his mouth, but he hung open like he was delusional, and maybe he was a little bit.

"What?" he finally managed.

She blinked a few times, and with each flutter of her eyelashes he felt his heard crack bigger and bigger.

_Inhale, exhale_. "I am moving to New York."

He didn't have to hear it again, he just wanted confirmation.

"No you're not, I haven't told you I love you yet," he spat at her loudly before he could control his feelings.

Something started boiling inside of her, but she wasn't sure why, and she knew that she would end up screaming back at him. "Yes I am!"

They stood there for a minute just looking at each other, taking in the sudden tention, before his whole comment fully registered in her brain.

"Wait-you love me?"

He panicked. What was he supposed to say? It was what he had gone to see her about that night, but he didn't expect her to be packing her things and moving to a completely different state.

_Yeah_, was all he could manage to spit out of his now dry mouth.

She zoned out, right then and there. Out somewhere in her own little universe.

He sighed and turned to pace, noticing things on her kitchen counter. He saw glue, crazy colored paper, glitter, stamps and crayons. He picked up a glue bottle and fiddled with it in his hands, not really sure of what he was thinking or doing until Cammie came strolling up behind him.

"Whacha looking at?" she asked, just as if nothing had happened between them only a few moments before.

"Craft stuff?" he said casually, playing along with her façade.

She crossed her arms and didn't look at him directly, only to bend down to a low drawer and get more of her utensils needed for her favorite pass time.

Picking up a bottle of glitter, he didn't realize he accidentally opened it. However, his hands were not dry due to his nervousness, so the bottle went flying.

He watched as the jar barely missed her head, but all the millions of pieces of shining dust didn't.

She slowly got up, not moving a muscle. She didn't turn to look at him. She just walked to the counter, grabbed another bottle of glitter and flung it his way.

Laughter then filled the small house as they continued to attack each other with the tiny sparkles until each were covered from head to toe.

* * *

><p><strong>Two minutes before<strong>

They ended up in a position where he was holding her from behind, she was still smiling like an idiot, feeling the familiar warmth she got whenever she was with him, and he didn't have a care in the world except for the girl in his arms.

She flashed to a time she didn't know, past future or present. She was with him though, and she was happy, dancing in the sunshine. Three little kids ran around them in what looked to her like a park. One boy and two girls who were laughing and being kids, the way it should be. A dog followed them, a chocolate lab, one that stuck out its tongue and barked happily. Then she could almost feel him grab her hand and squeeze it while they watched their kids play among the wildflowers next to the small, clear creek. It ripped her heart in two when reality set in, and she was leaving the next day.

"Please don't leave me," he whispered into the top of her head and instantly he knew he had made a mistake.

"I-I have to," she stuttered, and pulled herself out of his safe grip.

* * *

><p><strong>Present<strong>

"Please go," she whispered in the most hateful voice she could muster out of her body, in hopes that it would drive him away so her real soul didn't have to do it.

"I love you," he told her again with as much as he could give her, hoping it would change her mind. But he knew she was a wall that would never cave in. If he wanted something from her he would have to get it himself. The only problem was that he knew she wanted this, and he didn't know why but he didn't want to stand in her way.

And so she got her wish. After a final look at the girl who stole his whole world, he let go of her hand, walked backwards all the way to the strong wooden front door, opened it and walked out, closing it tightly after him. He stood outside her door for a minute or two, taking deep breaths and trying to remember what had happened in there, before something he didn't know guided him home.

She couldn't help herself, and didn't know why she did, but she made herself a cup of black coffee and watched as the tears that constantly poured out of her eyes ruined it.

* * *

><p><strong>Four days later<strong>

She lugged another heavy box from the moving truck seven floors down to the ground up to her new extremely small apartment. Huffing loudly she opened the door and sighed when she felt the cool air hit her face. It was a hundred degrees in the shade in New York that day, and there was no way Cammie could have escaped the cold.

She started to unpack the box, but instantly regretted it. She pulled out her craft supplies, the glue, stamps, paper and…glitter. One by one.

She wasn't sure what happened right after that, but she felt the goosebumps climb up her legs at an incredible pace, reaching her shoulders, making her shiver.

Maybe it was the cold air of her new home, or maybe it was the memory she had forgotten about only for about 10 minutes. His hands holding hers, begging her to stay.

But memories only went so far.

…

"Zach? Zach!" he heard as he sat at the diner in the middle of their small town.

"What?" he asked his best friend.

His best friend looked at him like he was an idiot. "What is wrong with you lately?"

Zach took the chance to take a bite of his sandwhich to avoid answering the question.

"It's Cammie, isn't it?" the other asked.

And he didn't have to know the answer.

"You know what to do," Zach's mostly right friend told him, grabbed his burger, and walked out, just like Zach had done four days before.

So he sat, and sat, and sat before he reached a decision. Knowing he would always have to get her himself, he practically ran out of the diner. He went home and grabbed anything he could think of, and dashed off.

He decided to follower her, to be with her, to feel her presence. His memory of her only went so far.

* * *

><p><strong>YOLO<strong>

**This one-shot was inspired by New York by Snow Patrol.**


End file.
